Beta Limbo Lower Now

And the waiting/anxiety/craptastic early pregnancy dance continues.

Over the weekend, I got nervous. I got nervous because my spotting didn't stop like I thought it would. I got nervous because my symptoms left me. Bbs back to normal, no more backache, headache, queasiness. So I got #3 beta, which came in at 144.4. Shit.

That gives me a doubling time of 54.9 hours. Did I say shit? Well, shit.

My wife, while lovingly optimistic, is keeping the faith. I, on the other hand, am calling this one "on its way out." Facts don't lie, folks. I'm still spotting- not a whole lot more- but still. My symptoms are rare and weak, and my betas aren't quite there. It's just easier for me to accept defeat at this time, rather than draw out this crazy-making process. I just want the whole fucking thing to be over. Bleed, already.

Sorry for the dour news (with an even more dour attitude), I just can't bring myself to fake positivity during this whole process.